HFE Extras
by 30026401
Summary: Taking place after Human From Earth. Short scene(s?) that came to mind for Adam and Mary. Mostly silly stuff.


**This just came out of nowhere after I read some other adorable stories. Hope you like it! Sorry for any poor grammar, I'm guilty of poor editing. **

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><p>It took Mary a fair amount of time to truly learn Common.<p>

By the time she _was _fluent most people had given up on meeting the new and rare human from "Earth," and had accepted her as the girl who shacked up with some paladin and disliked being approached with wordy questions. So when she was finally capable of explaining herself properly, nobody really bothered.

On the other hand, she had lots of questions to ask.

First they'd started out simple: "Where does the mail come from in the mailboxes?" (she still didn't understand and it's really just baffling)

Then they'd moved up in complexity: "What do you mean you don't know- why does nobody else want to know how the mail system works?"

Eventually Mary's curiosity turned towards Azeroth itself. Adam was charged with finding her extensive maps of both Kalimdor and the Eastern Kingdoms. His girlfriend was a geography buff, and often he'd find her sketching maps from her own home and compare them.

Not that _girlfriend _was the most accurate word, exactly, but eh… See Adam just wasn't quite sure how things worked in her world. What customs they had, so to speak. More importantly, how those customs might differ from the one's here, specifically pertaining to… this sorta… stuff. He wasn't even sure her people got married or anything. They hadn't talked about it... yet.

Adam was a confident guy. He knew who he was and what he was good at. Besides, it was rather hard to doubt himself when Mary would coo over him everytime he did so much as a simple healing spell on say, a papercut. He'd roll his eyes and insist it was nothing special- it wasn't- but her admiration would still leave him a little flustered.

Wait, flustered? No no. No, her admiration left him a stoic rock of masculine pride.

Either way, his and Mary's relationship was pretty steady, and the only time they were apart for remarkable amounts of time was when his assignments took him far away. He usually stuck with the jobs that kept him nearby, but every now and then there would be no avoiding it, and he'd be shipped out for a few weeks.

During one such deployment, when Mary was returning from her job as a scribe's assistant- the position apparently didn't require any affiliation with the arcane, just a talent for copying the swooping and curved glyphs created by the master- she came across a stray ball of fur.

She'd brought the suspicious little cretin home, and when Adam returned a week later she was still tending to the thing.

"By the Light- what is _that?" _he'd demanded, his initial welcoming embrace halted by the sight of her cradling this dark ball of fur with evil eyes glaring up at him.

She'd snickered at him, mumbling something wildly ridiculous that sounded a lot like "girlish shrieking" and said: "His name is Beans_..._and I was hoping you would know." She ran gentle fingers over what might have been ears. "There's nothing like him on Earth."

"Beans?" he echoed, incredulous.

"I had a cat named Beans before. This can be Beans Jr." She peered up at him, momentarily gracing him with her attention, before returning to the Beans_. _"A bean is something you eat," she explained the English word, "he doesn't look much like one, but neither did his, uh, Beans number one."

"His namesake?" Adam guessed, and she hummed affirmatively. "That's…" just play nice, he thought, the oversized rodent seemed to make her happy, "...nice."

She hummed again, too distracted by her silly cooing over the thing. "I've been feeding him scraps of meat, but I think he'll eat anything. I saw him chewing on my shoes too."

Light, what little monster had she found? He definitely didn't like the look in that things eyes- it was practically gloating at him. This was not the welcome he'd been hoping for.

"Alright," he paused, unsure how to begin, "I can take a look at it, see if I can… identify it." The word identify came out slowly- he wasn't sure he wanted to know what it was, or even if he could. He didn't sense anything malicious or unholy from it, _technically, _but it made him uneasy.

Mary went to hand it over, but he froze before taking it into his arms, eyeing it warily. "It doesn't bite, does it?"

She waved his concerns off. "Not hard enough to draw blood."

Of course not, he thought sourly. But he picked the thing up nonetheless, careful to keep it a fair distance away from his face. Thankfully he hadn't had time to remove his armor yet.

It had four legs that were half- hidden beneath it's absurd amount of fur. The fur itself was pitch black, and there hardly seemed to be any shine on it's coat- nor was the fur particularly soft. There might have been a tail somewhere near the back end, but Adam had a hard time discerning between what was pure fur and what was an actual limb.

"Where'd you find this?" he heard himself ask as he brushed aside fur to find a face… if it even had one.

Mary was beside him, looking at her pet with an adoring expression. It was a face he'd rather see aimed towards him, but apparently he was not so lucky. "Poor guy was huddled behind an empty crate in the Old District. He was all alone, and I think he's still just a baby." He felt her focus turn towards him, and his eyes flickered over. There was that determined look on her face. "Nobody else wanted him, Adam, and I couldn't just leave him there."

He sighed, seeing where this was going. He wasn't even going to fight it. "So we're keeping him, I take it?" He must have sounded as resigned as he felt, because she took the creature out of his hands, a grin on her face.

"Don't worry," she beamed. "He's a real sweetheart."

Adam looked at it's beady black eyes again. Somehow he doubted it.

"Oh c'mon, you'll grow to like him. Besides, you're sorta alike. You both have the same black hair, and constant frown," he blinked, suddenly conscious of the downwards tug of his muscles, "but underneath both you and Beans have the same kind and sweet heart."

He was frowning again, but this time it was to cover up the red flush he could feel spreading on his face.

She laughed and put the creature down. "Maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration," she admitted, stepping a little closer to him. "But I _am _very happy you're home."

His arms found their way around her, and she returned the gesture, wrapping her's around his neck. Finally. The weight of her pressed against him was just like he'd imagined it for the past week, and the gentle press of her lips against his jaw was so sweet his eyes nearly drifted closed. And they nearly did blissfully close except-

_it_ was staring, it's hawk like gaze drilling into his skull. Half hidden in the shadow of the stairs, the glint of it's eyes was enough to unnerve Adam.

Unholy beast, he swore silently, and tightened his hold on Mary, glaring back. Maybe this _Beans _had won Mary's affection but, no matter what sort of mutant rodent it was, he'd be watching.


End file.
